Two days and counting...

It's Saturday night and in two days I will visit my vascular surgeon to measure the veins and arteries in both arms to determine which will be the best site for my fistula. An arteriovenous fistula (AV fistula) is the connection of a vein and an artery, usually in the forearm, to allow access to the vascular system for hemodialysis, a procedure that performs the functions of the kidneys in people whose kidneys have failed. This has not been a sudden failure but a long slow process for the past 22 years. This is a struggle for me in many ways, not just staying alive but learning to live and eat differently. The expenses, the medicines, the god awful smelling vitamins. My head is spinning with decisions I will have to make. Changes in my job, my whole life is about change. I am lucky to have stayed away from dialysis this long. So for that I thank God...and pray this next step will not be as hard as my fears are making it seem.